Happiness and what it means to me
Happiness and what it means to me
Throughout life one of everyone's main goal is to find true happiness. At least for me when I am asked, "What is your biggest goal?", my answer has always been to find true happiness and inner peace. You may think differently that might not be your main goal and that is ok too. Yes, I have a lot of goals but I've learned to prioritize my mental health and being happy outshines all my other goals. Why? because if you are not happy then what do the other goals even matter? People spend their entire life trying to be happy. We set goals for ourselves that the only way we can be happy is if we complete these goals. We are to believe that happiness is there in the things we don't have. Weird huh.
Something else I have done is I've tried to create my happiness based on other people such as S/O. Those relationships never lasted when I did that. Other people can cause you to be happy but what happens when you don't have those people anymore? That "happiness" you thought they created for you goes right with them. Then what? You are left again feeling how you did prior to them. So many times have I tried to have other people/things be the reason I am happy. I was always left feeling empty. I'm not saying people can't help contribute with your happiness because sure they can, but I am just saying that they can't be the entire reason you are happy. Usually in relationships, I mistake excitement for happiness. Then after a few months that happiness disappears and I cut off all these great things thinking that they are making me sad and in reality its not. It was me. I thought it was fair to pinpoint my happiness on someone else. Then blamed them for my sadness. I have grew from that. I am thankful I did.
I don't think there is an end goal when it comes to happiness. I think you truly just have to find things that are meaningful to you that make you happy. Even if it is seemingly the stupidest thing, the smallest thing, if you can find slight happiness in it that's what matters. What you find enjoyment in is gonna be different than others. Happiness is defined so differently by all of us.
As close to happiness as I can be
Am I 100% happy? No. But I have learned how to be happy as much as I can. One thing that I have done to create happiness within myself is to appreciate myself for the small things. I mean the smallest things possible. I woke up today, I went to class, I worked that shift, I did that assignment. They are seemingly pointless things to some but to me they are accomplishments and the fact that I do those things makes me unbelievably happy. By showing myself some appreciation I feel so much better.
Something else that I do to create inner enjoyment is taking care of myself. Taking care of my mental health has always been a inconsistent battle for me. I never really got into it until I was older. For me, consistency is key with taking care of my physical health. I try to wake up everyday at the same time along with going to bed at the same time. I also started to take vitamins. I also am huge on skin care which is very important to me.
Appreciating my time alone is another thing that creates happiness for me. I was always someone that needed to have friends over all the time or always go to my friends house. I because accustomed to always being with someone. Of course I love my friends and I always have an amazing time when I am with them , but I became to comfortable in that. I graduated high school, moved out of my hometown, and lived in an apartment all by myself. That adjustment was awful for me. I was by myself so much. I became depressed, sleep deprived, and my anxiety was off the charts. I had 0 social life. I needed to train myself how to be ok with being alone. It took a while but it is actually something that I appreciate a lot. Learning how to be ok with being alone made me enjoy my time with others so much more. I became my own friend. Now, months later. I am sitting here writing this and really taking it in on how much I have grown with being alone.
As much as I love my alone time, my social life is a key contribution to my happiness. My friends are so important to me. I have not always had the best friends or been a good friend, but that is another post. However, the ones I do have are the best thing that could have ever happened to me. As you are growing up your daily life becomes very busy. It is easy to not see the people that matter to you as much. Make time for your friends. If you live at a distance give them a call. Make time for lunch. My social life was not always great. I found myself not reaching out to my friends and not saying 'yes' to invites. I still struggle with my social life, but it is something else I am working on. COVID was something that turned me into a very anti-social person.
Acknowledging the negative situations is something else I try to do sometimes. You may be wondering how am I supposed to be happy when you're telling me to acknowledge negative situations? Well for me at least, when something unhappy comes up in my life I like to definitely acknowledge it. I allow myself to feel the emotions it causes me, I quit trying to play this card that I am always happy. Once you acknowledge it, feel it, you can work to get back on track.
Facing things I am worried about or stressed about helps me be happy in the long run. I am someone that can not stand to be in a state of worrying about an upcoming event, or an unpleasant conversation, or even just doing tasks that I don't feel like doing. The sooner you face this stress, the sooner you can feel relief.
How can you work to be happy?
Like I said before we all believe we have to complete these crazy things to be happy or that happiness lies in other things. Yes, trying to aim for these different goals is a good thing. However, appreciating and finding those little things in the present that create happiness in your day-to-day life is also a really good thing to do that I think we all forget to do at times.
My advice to you is to start living in the moment more. Be proud of yourself for all achievements, big or small. Find things that help contribute to your happiness. Be responsible for yourself because no one else is but you. Of course these things may not work for you like they do for. These are just some personal things that have helped me with my journey of being happy!
Disclaimer: Everyone is different and I do not expect everyone to relate. These are just my personal experiences and some things that help me. I have linked a national hotline below that is free and confidential for individuals or families that are struggling with mental disorders.
Comments
Post a Comment